Wash, Rinse, Spin

I was in the rest room today and yet again a person leaves without washing.  WTF!  In this day and age is this still a crux for people to do?  Wash their hands after going to the bathroom?  I work in a hospital, and seeing this just makes me sick.  Who is this person going to shake hands with after they’ve just been draining the winky?  People have told me that pee is sterile, but that is no excuse.  It’s fucking gross!  I’m not one to be checking around making sure who goes in and out.  I don’t think there should be a bathroom report of all the people that come out of there without washing their hands, but there should be some measure.  Maybe I need to wear rubber gloves all the time here.  And those signs in there that say, “Employees must wash hands before handling food,” I’ve found that not true more than one time.  Can we have a little self-control?   A little courtesy?  A little cleanliness?

Oh, also those guys who stand at the urinal with their hand above, like they are holding up the wall, I’m sure your member can do all kinds of tricks.  Heck, maybe even it can play tunes on your guitar or take a Ritz from the wax paper sleeve, but can you just control that thing?  You keep your Doberman on a leash, why not your little monster? Can you direct it off the floor and walls?  It does have a mind of its own.  You might want to keep that in mind.   Also, to the one that feels the need to put their boogers on the flush handle, very funny, we are all giving you a hearty laugh.  You can stop that now.  No.  Really.   Stop it now!

Bathroom etiquette is not just your mother telling you should do something for no reason.  Do you really want to spread or catch Cytomegalovirus infection (something I found on the CDC website transmitted by urine).  Not washing after a grand dump you could transmit:

Campylobacter
Cryptosporidiosis
Giardiasis
Hand, foot and mouth disease (I’ve had this. It’s not fun and very contagious)
Hepatitis A
Meningitis (viral)
Rotavirus infection
Salmonella
Shigella
Thrush
Viral gastroenteritis
Worms
Yersiniosis.

Here is a list:  http://www.health.sa.gov.au/pehs/ygw/waysspread-pehs-sahealth-2009.pdf

I’m not a doctor, but some of those things don’t look so good.  We are all adults and should know better.   Wash!  A little soap, a little rinse, and everyone is happy!

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EJ Eisman is the author of the novels Spoon Girl and Malaise, pubished by AuthorHouse. He resides in Reading, PA and is also a musician, artist, playwright, actor and filmmaker.